The 8 worse Tinder dates (for her)

Dating apps are a thing now, and more and more people use them to find new friends, meet people and find love. Seems perfect, right?

But often first dates turned out to be a disaster, and the person who seemed so sweet and nice on the chat reveals to be different from what we were expecting?

Just around the corner, the scam is always lurking, but it’s somehow possible to protect ourselves. Today we will list the 8 worse men you could go on a first date with, this way you can be fully prepared.

PS: Our next episode will feature the 8 worse women. We are all about gender equality.

The Sommelier

He invites you for dinner at a nice place with well-dressed servers, and you’re soon expecting a perfect evening. Too bad that he takes 3 hours just to choose the wine, explains all the organoleptic characteristics, goes on sipping it, tasting it, rotating the glass and takes the joy out of drinking that red wine, which you would merely describe as “very good”.

Next time, go for a pizza and a beer. You can’t go wrong with that!

The gym rat

The photo will look good for sure. Nice body, buff but not too much, and let’s admit it, everyone loves abs. the only thing is that the conversation only rotates around at how many times he worked the bench, how many knee-bends he did, his diet plan with a perfect protein-carbs balance, meanwhile, you are dreaming about going back home, watch Netflix and have chips and popcorn like there’s no tomorrow.

The car enthusiast

You got suspicious right from his Tinder profile picture: standing in front of his car, driving his car, all dressed in red watching the Monza Gran Prix. But still, you decide to give him a chance, and soon you find yourself spending the evening in the car while he talks about engines, horsepower, acceleration and you’re as bored as you were as a kid, on Sundays after family lunch, when they would force you to watch the Formula One championship.

Just think about when someone asks you what car you’re driving, the only answer you can give is: “I drive a sky blue car.”

Sunglasses     

You never saw his eyes. You thought it was only for the pictures, but it’s like that all the time: he never takes off his sunglasses, not even for a happy hour indoors.

He thinks he looks like a “tall dark stranger”, but meanwhile you feel like hanging out with a Mexican Narcos.

If only he had Ottovolante sunglasses! Instead, he wears some trashy mirrored sunglasses, which you can at least check your makeup in, while pretending to look him in the eyes.

The traveler

He told you he traveled the world, saw lots of places, and you got hooked. But you soon find out that, indeed, he traveled abroad, but in an all-inclusive trip to Sharm-El-Sheik, where the staff was completely Italian, because if he doesn’t eat spaghetti for one day he feels sick.

To be fair, he traveled another time too: he went to Switzerland, how exotic!

Mama's boy

Sweet, cute, nice, but from time to time he needs to excuse himself to make a mysterious phone call. You think it might be work, or maybe he has a girlfriend. But it’s way worse than that, he has to call his mom every half hour because they are so very close.

Let’s hope he won’t ask her how to proceed with the date, that would be terrifying.

The Ghost

You guys spent a lovely night, he keeps texting you sweet messages, day and night. Then, suddenly, nothing. You text him on WhatsApp and he doesn’t read it, you try to call him and he doesn’t pick up, he disappears, like an ectoplasm.

After a few weeks, when you can finally get a hold of him, he replies that he was very busy at work. Too bad you saw on Instagram that he went to Formentera with a brunette. 

He might be a champion in disappearing, but he’s certainly not that smart…

The one who just broke up

While you’re there, next to each other, ready to kiss, he starts crying. You think that maybe you did something wrong, but he tells you he’s really sad because he just broke up but he still thinks about her. Then he goes on talking about her, telling you how much he loved her, how beautiful she was and how much he misses her.

One piece of advice: listen to him, and after 45 minutes sharp you tell him that you time is up. Because we’re all about going to therapy, but at least keep it professional. And don’t forget to send him the bill at the end.

Whether you believe in love, or in the possibility of meeting interesting people, we recommend you to wear a fabulous pair of Ottovolante glasses to your first date! You will make a good impression for sure, let’s just hope he won’t belong to any of the categories above.